Soon In Seattle – No Fun Allowed

J.J. Jackson* | June 9, 2008

Filed Under General Goofiness, Global Warming, Liberals

Seattle is in a battle with California to see who can be the most liberal state in the union. New York is a distant fourth in this race right behind Massachusetts.

So how is Seattle planning to take the lead from perennial winner California? Well, they are working at taking away anything that might be fun – such as banning bon fires because their Savior Al Gore has got them scared crapless over Global Warming.

Even with the skies overcast and threatening rain, Khang Nguyen, 18, and Joel Juan, 19, kicked back after school at Alki Beach.

“It’s just a relaxing way to hang out with friends,” Nguyen said of the bonfire crackling in front of them one evening earlier this week.

But Seattle Parks and Recreation might do what even this week’s chilly weather couldn’t — douse the long tradition of beach bonfires at Alki and at Golden Gardens.

Park department staff is recommending reducing bonfires at the two beaches this summer and possibly banning them altogether next year.

The park board will hear the recommendation Thursday, and the city plans to run public-service announcements and hand out brochures later this month about the effects of bonfires on global warming.

According to a memo to the park board from the staff released Thursday, “The overall policy question for the Board is whether it is good policy for Seattle Parks to continue public beach fires when the carbon … emissions produced by thousands of beach fires per year contributes to global warming.”

Still actually waiting to see this “Global Warming” the disciples of Al Gore keep mentioning. We’ve had an awfully cold spring so far in western PA.

Next up? Mandatory activated carbon filled butt plugs to stop your methane filled farts from ruining the environment.

Seattle’s new city motto? “Seattle – where fun is a four letter word!” Now sit down and obey your masters and work harder for the glory of the state!

Contributor's website: http://www.libertyreborn.com

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