There’s A Hole In The Bucket!

Carolyn Hileman - The Voice* | May 3, 2008

There’s A Hole In The Bucket!
By: J.J. Jackson

Perhaps as a child you once sang a fun little ditty about a hapless man,
named Henry, and his beloved, named Liza. See, this song is about a
problem Henry has. His bucket has a hole in it so it is pretty much
useless. But instead of handling the problem himself, he runs to ask
Liza what he should do.

Henry is like the typical person in America that thinks they are far too
incompetent to know how handle their own problems and runs to the
government for help. Of course, in the beginning, the answer is obvious
and Liza is more than happy to help with “common sense”.

Henry, holding up his leaky bucket says to Liza, “There’s a hole in the
bucket, dear Liza, dear Liza. There’s a hole in the bucket, dear Liza,
a hole.”

Liza responds back with the obvious, “So fix it dear Henry, dear Henry,
dear Henry. So fix it dear Henry, dear Henry, fix it.”

Now, did Henry really need to run to Liza to get this wisdom imparted to
him? No, but he did it anyway. This is the way dependency on
government always begins. And of course, having gotten help once, he
immediately goes back for more. Hey, free help is always appreciated.

So instead of just fixing the bucket he gets more inquisitive. “With
what should I fix it, dear Liza, dear Liza? With what should I fix it,
dear Liza, with what?”

Liza responds, “With straw, dear Henry, dear Henry, dear Henry. With
straw, dear Henry, dear Henry, with straw.” That response is a mistake
Liza will soon regret. Because now Henry knows he has her on the hook.
Why should he figure out the solution himself when he has someone so
ready to “help” him.

“But the straw is too long, dear Liza, dear Liza. The straw is too long,
dear Liza, too long.”

“So cut it dear Henry, dear Henry, dear Henry,” Liza answers. “So cut
it dear Henry, dear Henry, cut it!”

“With what should I cut it, dear Liza, dear Liza? With what should I cut
it, dear Liza, with what?” Henry continues.

“Use the hatchet, dear Henry, dear Henry, dear Henry. Use the hatchet,
dear Henry, the hatchet!”

Now Henry begins to whine, “But the hatchet’s too dull, dear Liza, dear
Liza. The hatchet’s too dull, dear Liza, too dull.”

“So, sharpen it, dear Henry, dear Henry, dear Henry. So sharpen it dear
Henry, dear Henry, sharpen it!”

Wow! This is so easy, thinks Henry! And such progress is being made!
“I don’t have to think for myself!” he says to himself and then asks of
Liza, “With what should I sharpen it, dear Liza, dear Liza? With what
should I sharpen, dear Liza, with what?”

“Use the stone, dear Henry, dear Henry, dear Henry. Use the stone, dear
Henry, dear Henry, the stone.”

So Henry comes back with another inquiry, “But the stone is too dry,
dear Liza, dear Liza. The stone is too dry, dear Liza, too dry.”

“So wet it, dear Henry, dear Henry, dear Henry. So wet it dear Henry,
dear Henry, wet it.”

Now we’re cooking Henry thinks to himself and continues, “With what
should I wet it, dear Liza, dear Liza. With what should I wet it, dear
Liza, with what?”

By now Liza certainly has to be wondering if she married a complete
idiot. “With water, dear Henry, dear Henry. With water, dear Henry,
with water.”

“With what should I carry it, dear Liza, dear Liza? With what should I
carry it dear Liza, with what?”

You can almost envision Liza shaking her head at this point as she
replies, “With the bucket dear Henry, dear Henry. With the bucket dear
Henry, the bucket!”

So Henry looks at his bucket and reminds Liza, “There’s a hole in the
bucket, dear Liza, dear Liza. There’s a hole in the bucket, dear Liza, a
hole!”

Yes, despite all the “free help” Henry was getting from Liza he wound up
right back where he started. He still has a bucket with a hole in it
incapable of holding the water he wants to fetch. Liza, was completely
incapable of solving his problem despite the appearance that, for a
while anyway, progress was actually being made towards solving the problem.

There is a lesson here for people that turn to the government for help
year after year yet never actually better their lot in life. In the
long run they are left holding the same old useless bucket - just like
Henry.

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J.J. Jackson is a libertarian conservative author who has been writing
and promoting individual liberty since 1993 and is President of Land of
the Free Studios, Inc. He is the lead editor of Conservative News &
Opinion – The Land of the Free and also the owner of The Right Things –
Conservative T-shirts & Gifts (http://www.cafepress.com/rightthings).
His weekly commentary along with exclusives not available anywhere else
can be found at http://www.libertyreborn.com